Dear A Song Of Ice And Fire series,

I will be the Reek to your Ramsay Bolton. No matter how much pain you deal out (and by "pain", I mean "relentless wheel-spinning topped by vicious cliffhangers"), I swear I will be coming back for more.

I love the way it hurts.

Hugs and kisses,
Me.

George R.R. Martin's "A Dance With Dragons: Logistics, Or Why Lack Of Easily Accessible Intercontinental Travel Really Blows."